Best of the Worst

I do my civic duty and vote. And I am responsible enough to be an informed voter and know which issues matter to me and which candidates best represent me. I read a lot, I talk to others, I listen.

But usually I wish there were more options. Or maybe not more, but better. I often end up voting something close to a straight party ticket, which I feel is a bit of a cop-out. Do I think that party is always best? Yes. No. Yes.

Best of the other options on the ballet? Yes.

100% right all the time? No. Not at all.

Lesser of the two evils (and I am aware that there are in fact more than two options, but realistically we live in a two-party country). Yes.

Still. I wish politics was less often taken over by politicians.

Let Me See the Ring!

So I have recently gotten engaged. (No, not because of the health insurance issues raised in my last post.) And one of the first things people ask is to see the ring. And it's a natural instinct ... I've asked that question myself of the newly engaged female.

And I show them. And I tell them my favorite feature of the ring: It is from a mall kiosk, and it cost $21 with tax. It's pretty -- it says Love and the O is a (fake, obvs) diamond.

"But why didn't you get a real ring?" And not to knock other people's diamonds (if you want one, by all means you should have one), but I do have reasons. To wit:

• It's a custom I don't really understand. Why does the woman get one but not the man? Is she being bought? Bribed?
• They are ridiculously expensive. This is by no means the main reason, but saving several hundred dollars that could be spent on something I do want is a nice perk.
• The diamond industry ... what a racket!
• I don't really wear jewelry. Not for a good reason, I just don't. And my finger tends to vary in size, even within the span of one day (but it's always super tiny).

So those are my thoughts. And I will sport my Piercing Pagoda ring until the wedding date, when it will be replaced by a sweet tattoo!

My Contribution to the Healthcare Debate

I can be a shouter, but plenty of shouting is already happening around the healthcare debate. Nonetheless, here's my story.

Now that I've shacked up and Boyfriend is laid off, it's time to add him to my insurance. I'm lucky enough to have employer-subsidized insurance, and my plan offers domestic partner benefits. It's a high deductible plan, but I have some money saved in my HSA and so far all has worked for me. Perfect. Almost.

I go to work and ask how to go about adding a domestic partner. You have to fill out a form and have it notarized (for the record, you are not required to prove you are actually married with any type of official form). Fine. His premium is not pre-tax like mine and like a spouse's would be. Slightly less fine, but grit my teeth and agree to pay it.

Oh ... and he can't access the money in my HSA. And my employer can't contribute to the HSA at the rate they would if we were married. Not fine.

Apparently it's an IRS rule. Since he isn't married, getting the full benefit of my insurance (which we would be paying for) is too much of a tax advantage. Remember that Boyfriend is not fortunate enough to be employed full-time (not for lack of interest or skills), so a tax burden is indeed burdensome.

So, now it comes down to marriage being a tax benefit for the married. We're fortunate enough to have the option to get married (a subject for another post), but we have chosen to remain unmarried for the time being (yet another post). I don't think access to healthcare is a good reason to get married (I'm sure it happens, though). I don't understand why standing in front of a judge or a minister would suddenly make him more attractive to insurers. I don't understand why marriage is a state institution (oops, treading on the ground of that other post).

So, to recap, my healthy 30-year-old boyfriend and I (a healthy 29-year-old) will pay about $900 a year for his insurance. Which will kick in after he reaches $3,000 in medical bills (let's all hope this doesn't happen). If it's a truly catastrophic event, we will pay over $5,000 out of pocket, and we won't be able to use my health savings account to pay for any of it -- and since we don't typically have an extra five grand, that money will either wipe out our savings or come from some type of loan, or we will pay a hefty tax penalty. We want him to have insurance. We want to pay for it. But the system sure does make it difficult. I've never written to a politician before, but I am researching addresses.

Better Late Than Never

Today is Cinco de Mayo. Since up until last year I was ignorant as to the meaning of this holiday - like probably most of you, I thought it was Mexico's independence day - here is a free history lesson for your edification.

Cinco de Mayo is the celebration of the day the Mexican army - wildly outnumbered - defeated the French at the Battle of Pueblo. The war eventually went to the French, but not the battle. I'm told today is actually a bigger deal in the U.S. than it is in Mexico.

So now you learned something. I went to a festival today featuring different businesses and mariachi and Latino dancers. And apparently there was free food, but I refuse to stand in line for an hour for a hot dog and a taco. Still an enjoyable evening though.

If you need more history than I have provided here, see what my friends at Wikipedia have to say: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cinco_de_Mayo.

What Could Be

I sometimes wonder if I'm better suited for work in the non-profit sector. I think I might be: I have a lot of causes I feel strongly about, I like helping people, I need a lot of variety in my work, and I'm not motivated by money (which is good, because I did not choose an especially lucrative career path).

Then today I read that women who work for nonprofits are more likely to marry rich men, because they are in contact with wealthy donors. And working in my current job has not led to a lot of (any) contact with wealthy single men.

Anyone have a non-profit job I would be good at? I'm skilled and cute.






Disclaimer: Don't read too much into this. Things at work are fine, and things with Boyfriend are better than fine. But I have an active fantasy life.

Lecture

So as a blogger, I have two choices: be someone who never talks about politics, controversial subjects or deeply personal messages, or be someone who talks about those things if so moved. And since I can't keep my mouth shut, I've decided to talk (write) about whatever I want.

So today's subject: Special Olympics is mounting a campaign to ban derogatory use of "retarded." There's a petition at www.r-word.org. I encourage you all to sign it and support this cause.

Why? It's just a word. It doesn't mean anything. Right?

Wrong. Singling out people with any type of disabilities and categorizing them as "other" takes away some of their humanity. It asserts that you are better than they are. And it brings already-disadvantaged people lower. And you don't need to do that. You may be able to make change or tie your shoe or write poetry, but I hope you don't think that defines you. Just as some people's inability to do those things doesn't define them.

I urge you to check out Special Olympics's page. If you're so moved, I urge you to sign the petition and/or support this worthy cause in other ways. And please stop using that word.

P.S. If there were a petition to stop using "gay" in the same manner I'd tell you to sign that too For the same reason.